Feelings of Fear

Have you ever been so afraid of something that every time you think about it your palms get a little sweaty and your heart beats a little faster? Have you ever loved something so much and then at the same time feared it? I feel that way about softball. I love to play softball! I get to play tonight as a matter of fact, and I’m very excited about it. The part I fear though, is pitching. I have always been a pitcher and couldn’t imagine playing on a regular basis without pitching. It gets boring to me if I’m not pitching. But in the last several years I have been hit in the legs by balls that are hit right back at me after I throw it; and let me tell, that hurts! It left bruises that lasted for weeks and months. After the last time I got hit, I swore that I would never play softball again. That was probably 2 years ago I think. Now that some of my youth group have gotten old enough to play, we got a team together for the spring league. I’m not quite sure how I became the coach but I am; and I’m also the pitcher. I am so excited to get to play tonight! The weather is wonderful and it just feels like a good day to play. Then I start to think about pitching and my heart speeds up and I will admit that I feel a little terrified. I just keep telling myself that I can do this though. I tell myself that just because I’m afraid of something, doesn’t mean that I will let it rule my life. I love pitching so I’m not going to let this fear control me and keep me from doing something I love. 2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. I know it might seem kind of silly to talk about my fear of pitching and God in the same paragraph, but He wants us to look to Him in the small things right along with the big. It’s part of my life and He wants to be included in every single aspect of it. So I am trusting Him that I will be okay, there is nothing to fear because He will be right there watching me on while I play softball tonight. My parents never came to any of my tennis matches, softball games or golf matches when I was in high school. But I know God, my Heavenly Father will be in the front row watching my every move and cheering for me every second!

~ by scootergirl1978 on April 3, 2009.